Good morning Progress,
It’s been 4 days, 10 hours, and 22 minutes since we interacted. I am beginning to think you really don’t like me.
Five days ago I almost called you, I needed to know you were near instead I waited and waited and waited. Now here we are.
I reached out to Comfort but also got no answer.
I realized that waiting for you is a passive way to get things done. I had to really sit and think…’Why do I want to sit and wait for Progress to make the first move all the time?’
In my quiet time I realized that a huge part of my on again off again relationship with you, Progress, is centered around my own beliefs and behaviors. I limited our relationship because I limit my belief in myself.
Oh, the disappointment I felt when I realized I am the one holding my self back from the experience Progress offers.
I began to beat myself up that I caused every break-up you and I ever had. I caused Comfort to be my escape plan time and time again.
Why…why… I beat myself over the head trying to figure out if there is a way to change this pattern.
Progress, I want a relationship with you more than I know how to vocalize but I keep up so many walls I don’t know how to accept you belong in my life.
Progress, you bring so many micro lessons that give me a massive jolt of fear that causes me to often run back to the arms of Comfort.
Progress, I would like us to work on a relationship. I want to accept that I deserve you in my life. I want to embrace the changes you have for me without running away.
Progress, I am doing the best I can. Please meet me half way.
I have to go now because Vulnerability is calling. Until we meet again, thanks for the lesson.
Lots of love,