My heart stopped at the moment I realized things were as they seemed.
My eyes filled with tears as the pain entered every crease in my body.
My head began to spin and everything seemed to quickly close in.
Progress is fleeting and the there is only pain left. My mind can’t comprehend how to ever overcome this trauma.
I sit here broken hearted and disgusted. I actually question so many things and the process that is happening.
Transformation is so much harder than I ever imagined. I don’t want to be angry. I don’t want to feel this pain. I don’t want to be frustrated and I don’t want fall again.
Here I am in the midst of my torment and can’t even dry my face long enough to take a breath. I feel so much and it goes so deep. Progress I thought you were going to protect me.
But here I sit with the same shame and guilt. I can’t let go and I can’t give in. Progress why did I even begin.